


God Help Me

by superangsty



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Five Year Mission, I think I'm crazy for trying this again, Multi, Slow Build, TOS rewrite, will add more tags as the story progresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-13
Updated: 2016-09-27
Packaged: 2018-08-14 21:10:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8029090
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superangsty/pseuds/superangsty
Summary: “To five years in space!”
   “To five years in space!” Everyone repeated, with Bones’ added “God help me.”  Or, the one where everything is different but at the same time not really.





	1. Prologue - 5 year mission

**Author's Note:**

> Starts just after the events of Into Darkness, and should go through to past the events of beyond.
> 
> I have posted this fic before. Twice, to be exact. But that was, I think, two or three years ago, and I can't believe it's been that long. But each time I tried to post it I ended up unable to keep up with it all, and took it down. So if you get a deja vu when reading this, that's why. However only the prologue is going to be the same as it was before, the rest I'll be starting from scratch, and coming from a completely different direction. Please be patient with me, and I hope you enjoy!

“We’re assigning the enterprise to a five year mission.”

Jim couldn’t help but stare at Admiral Komack. He had thought of hundreds of reasons for being asked to meet with the admiral, had carefully gone over every possible situation in his mind, preparing himself for the worse, but this had definitely not been on his list. The Enterprise crew had caused so much trouble recently that surely, in the eyes of the admiralty, a demotion was far more in order than him being given everybody’s dream mission.

Jim was trying very hard to hide the surprise in his voice as he answered “Wow. Thank you, Admiral, this is a huge honour.” but apparently it was still noticeable, because he could have sworn that he saw Komack’s eyes flash with amusement.

Komack picked up a PADD and scanned over its contents as he said “You deserve it, kid. Now, do you want to make any alterations to your current crew or are you fine as it is? Because I’ll need you to give me any changes you want to be made as soon as possible.”

He thought of Spock, and the fact that he had barely looked at him, never mind talked to him, since he woke up in the med bay. He had really started to think that their friendship had progressed, that they were finally going to start getting along, only to have everything come crashing back down. But, he was still one of Starfleet’s best officers, so Jim replied “No thank you Admiral, my crew is awesome as it is.” aaannnd he was already regretting using the word ‘awesome’, but it was too late to take it back now.

Luckily, the admiral didn’t comment on it, his eyes still glued to his PADD as he waved a hand and said “Excellent, you’re dismissed.”

He practically skipped out of the office in excitement, except of course, that would be unprofessional, and so skipping was definitely not a thing that he did. Nope, not at all. However, the (not) skipping didn’t last long, as he stopped in his tracks when he saw who was waiting for him.

“Gary,” he said, grinning at the sight of him “what are you doing here?”

The other man’s shoulders visibly relaxed upon seeing how happy Jim was. “Are you kidding? I was worried sick. I’m here to make sure that you didn’t get fired.”

“Should I be offended that you thought that my being fired was a possibility?”

Gary wrapped an arm around his shoulders and pulled him into a quick hug “Nah, they would never fire you. You’re only the best captain in the fleet and all. What did Komack want with you, anyway?”

“We got the mission - five whole years in space!” Jim could feel his grin get even wider as he said it, pride bubbling up inside him.

“Which, of course, further proves my point that you’re the best captain in the fleet.”

 “I think you might be a little biased.” laughed Jim, looking up at him before pulling out of the hug and starting to walk (still definitely not skipping) towards the exit.

Gary did a quick jog to catch up with him again. “How dare you suggest such a thing?” he gasped, trying to look mock offended. His acting skills had never been great, or even mildly good, for that matter.

Jim pushed him lightly on the shoulder before saying “Lets comm the others and tell them – we should go to that new campus bar to celebrate.” He paused briefly to consider before continuing, “Do you think an hour is long enough notice?”

 

~***~

 

Spock was meditating when he heard his communicator chirp. He had been meditating with increasing frequency for months, after all, it was meant to help him clear his mind, which, try as he might, only seemed to be getting fuller. Briefly glancing at the clock on his wall, he decided that it was too late for the message to be of any importance, and so attempted to fall back into his previous trance. Despite the practice that the extra meditation sessions gave him, he had been finding it more and more difficult to focus on his meditation recently, although he found himself unable to explain why.

His attempt must have failed, as he was still aware of his surroundings approximately 46 minutes and 53 seconds later when his door sounded. He got up slowly and repressed a sigh; the caller was uninvited and he did not desire company at this time.

Opening the door revealed a rather irritated looking Uhura, who was looking at her watch with the air of somebody who was running late. She quickly walked through the door, once again uninvited, eyeing Spock critically. “I’m assuming that you didn’t get my message then.”

Ah. So it had been her who had brought him out of his meditation. “No, I was otherwise occupied at the time.”

Uhura’s irritation seemed to increase, and she said hurriedly “Well it’s too late to explain now, go get dressed into normal clothes and hurry up.”

Spock obliged, knowing that if he didn’t he would only anger her further, although for what reason he did not know. When he reached his wardrobe, Spock realised that the style of clothing had not been specified, and had to think of what Nyota had been wearing, which had seemed relatively casual, so he pulled out a dark pair of jeans and a shirt for himself. Not his preferred garments, by any means, but he could recall her complaining about his traditional Vulcan attire on previous ‘dates’ they’d been on. He changed as quickly as he could, and then walked back out into the main living area and pulled on a pair of shoes.

When Spock stood up and straightened his shirt he heard a wolf whistle, and turned to face Uhura, his eyebrow once again raised. “I assume we need to be leaving now, although to where you have still not told me.”

As they walked out of the door she replied with “If I told you, you would refuse to come with me.”

They walked in silence for a few moments before she glanced over at him and said “So the Enterprise got the five year mission.”

“Yes, I expected that it might.” He was acquainted with many high ranking officers who had all hinted at this being the case, not that it mattered to him, since he was certain that he would not be returning to the Enterprise any time soon.

She looked at him incredulously before continuing, “Yeah, well none of us did, and Jim wanted us all to go out and celebrate.”

Spock froze. He understood now why she had thought that he was going to avoid going to this celebration. He made to turn around but Nyota grabbed his arm before he could. Through the contact he could feel concern, and he looked over at her questioningly.

She gave him a pitying look. “Spock, you can’t avoid him forever, y’know, I doubt it would be ‘logical’ for the first officer to ignore his captain.” He opened his mouth in protest, but before he could speak she cut him off, “And don’t you dare say that you’re not avoiding him, because you are. You haven’t talked to him in months, not since he woke up. He’s really worried that he’s done something to offend you.”

“That is entirely illogical. The captain could never do anything to ‘offend’ me, as you say.” He doubted that there was anything the captain could do that would make his regard for him lessen, although he wasn’t about to say that to Nyota, of all people.

“Just - talk to him, okay?” She turned into the entrance of a small bar and put on her brightest grin.

 

~***~

 

“Looks like the hobgoblin decided to come after all.” Bones grumbled to Jim, who elbowed him in the side before standing up to greet Uhura with a hug. He was still getting used to the fact that she wasn’t going to kick him in the balls whenever he so much as touched her, so he was taking every opportunity that he had.

He pulled away and said “We were wondering if you guys were ever going to show up, we haven’t even got our drinks yet.” Jim turned to Spock and gave an awkward “Good to see you.”, and then turned back to the table, counting how many people were there.

“I’m assuming you’ll just want your usual drinks, ‘cause I’m really not up for taking orders.” Jim said, walking over to the bar before anybody had the chance to request something else.

He got back surprisingly quickly; one of the bonuses of being famous was that you could always get to the front of a crowd. If it had been any other bar, he would probably have had to stop and sign a few holos, but luckily it was within Starfleet grounds, so the patrons were used to seeing him around. When he set down the drinks everybody reached for theirs, until there was just one drink left in the middle. Jim picked it up and handed it to Spock.

“Vulcans are not affected by alcohol, captain.” Spock said to him, looking at him with disdain. Wow, guess he really _was_ mad at Jim.

“First of all, we’re off duty, so it’s Jim.” It felt like that was the millionth time he had asked that. In fact, it probably _was_ the millionth time, by this point. “Secondly, it’s not alcohol, it’s chocolate milk.” Jim gave Spock what he considered to be his cheekiest smile. Of course he had done his research. A lot of people would pay good money to see Spock drunk.

“And finally, you guys can’t start drinking yet- we haven’t done the toast.” Everybody raised their glasses and looked expectantly at the captain.

“To five years in space!”

“To five years in space!” Everyone repeated, with Bones’ added “God help me.” and then gulped down their drinks.

Jim looked around at them all, hoping that nothing would change once they were up on the ship, that they could still do things like this. Everybody always said that working on a starship made it difficult to keep up friendships, but he couldn’t see how that was possible. After all, they’d be stuck with each other for weeks at a time in between assignments, surely they would have time to ‘bond’ or do whatever it was that friends were meant to do.

A few minutes later they had all finished their first drinks, and Chekov was getting up to buy the next round. Was he even allowed to buy alcohol? Who knew?

Before he could walk to the bar, Gary cleared his throat, and everybody looked at him expectantly.

“Right, thanks. Um, well I swear I won’t be long…” Wow, this wasn’t like Gary at all, Jim thought, he’s normally the most confident person he knew, “It’s just that I- I have something to say and I want us to be sober enough to remember it.”

“Just spit it out already.” Jim laughed, and everyone else gave small chuckles too.

Gary gave a small smile and continued, “Okay then, well, Jim?” Jim caught his eye before he started fumbling around in his pockets, and pulled out a small box. Nyota gave a gasp, and everyone else fell silent. “Will you marry me?”

Jim pulled him into a deep kiss, and whispered “Of course I will, you idiot.”

 

~***~

 

Spock’s shields came crashing down. He tried to maintain a calm composure, but he knew it wouldn’t last long. Chekov had once again started towards the bar, and Spock managed to choke out “No more for me ensign, I am not sure what will happen if I become further inebriated, but I believe, in earth vernacular, I would become ‘hung over’.” And if anybody noticed the tiniest crack in his voice, they didn’t say anything. He got up and rushed out of the door, desperate to be anywhere but there.

But he found that he did not desire to be at home either. He looked at his surroundings and worked out the fastest way to the park, and within a few minutes he was sat beneath a tree, grateful for the dark so that nobody could see his shoulders shaking ever so slightly.

“Hey.” At the sound of someone else’s voice he looked up, wondering who else would be in the park at this hour. It was dark, and most people tended to avoid being somewhere where they weren’t completely certain of their surroundings.

“Nyota?” Of course. “What are you-“ but she cut him off before he could finish the sentence.

“Comfort, Spock,” She replied, concern evident in her eyes, “that’s what friends are for.” She sighed and sat down next to him. “You know, I thought you’d be here, you always did like the calm of it.”

Spock shuffled slightly further away from her, and continued to stay silent. He did not need comfort. Needing comfort would imply that he was emotionally compromised. Which he was not.

“You do not need to be here. The others-“

Once again he was cut off by her. “The others can wait. Right now, I’m going to talk, and you’re going to keep quiet and listen. Understood?”

Unsure of whether or not he should speak, Spock gave a small nod, but still didn’t look at her.

“Good,” she started, “Spock, you see everything coming, how could you not have expected this?” he assumed that this was rhetorical, and anyway, he still wasn’t sure if he was allowed to speak, so stayed silent, “Somebody as logical as you should be able to put two and two together. Jim and Gary have been dating since their first year at the academy, it was always going to happen someday. And I know that you had hoped that something would change – and don’t tell me I’m wrong because I know it’s true.” She sighed again, “I’ve known for months, Spock, why do you think I terminated our relationship?” At this, she stopped talking, and leaned her head back against the tree.

Grateful for the silence, Spock thought about what she had said. He did not understand why she, of all people, was attempting to make him feel better. Surely it was her who should have the most reason to hate him. After all, he did spend the majority of their relationship in love (no, love was an emotion) – interested in someone else. He would not allow himself to become compromised over the inevitable. Jim was happy, and that was all that mattered.

“I’m sorry.” he heard Nyota whisper.

 

~***~

 

>>From: Commander Spock

    To: Captain Kirk

    Subject: Request for transfer to another ship.

>>From: Captain Kirk

    To: Commander Spock

    Subject: Request denied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, there it is! Please leave comments, it's a lot more likely I'll find motivation to keep writing if I know people like what I'm doing. You can also come and talk to me over on my [tumblr!](http://superangsty.tumblr.com) I'd be more than happy to answer any questions you have, or just to chat!
> 
> At the moment, I won't be working on an update schedule, so again, please be patient with me? This might change as I get further through the fic, but so far I'll just update when I have the chance.


	2. The Man Trap (part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 1 of 2. Based on the TOS episode 'the man trap'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter will be posted in either two or three parts, because I didn't want to delay the update any more by trying to finish the whole thing first. Enjoy!

_2 months later_

Putting down the last of the boxes he’d carried in, Jim looked around his new quarters. Whilst his old room had been perfectly comfortable at the time he was in them, compared to these new rooms it had practically been a box; cramped and holding the bare minimum of what he needed to live on when in space. This time the mission would have them away for the entire five years when previously they’d only been gone for a few weeks at a time, so all the quarters on the ship had been redesigned to act more like a home than simply a place to sleep. Not that Jim planned on sleeping much, with all the work he would be doing.

Still, there was always the worry that Jim and Gary had packed too much to fit into the office, bedroom and living area. They had pretty much packed up their entire apartment, not seeing any point in leaving things if they were barely going to be there at all over the next five years. But it did mean that there were a lot of boxes, and Jim had no idea where to start with the unpacking.

He found a box labelled ‘clothes’ and got started with hanging them in the closet. It wasn’t long before he was interrupted, however, by a voice saying “I think this may be the biggest bedroom on a starship that I’ve ever seen.”

“Not that that’s saying much,” Jim replied, turning and smiling to greet Gary with a quick kiss. “You finally come to help me unpack?”

“But of course,” said Gary, giving an exaggerated bow, “I am entirely at your service.”

“Great, so if you start with the books, and I’ll – “

He was interrupted with Gary saying “ – And _you_ will go into the office to do that paperwork you’re itching to do.”

Jim stopped in his tracks, shooting a questioning look at his fiancé. “Really?”

“Well, I’d rather you do it now than in the middle of the night. I can handle unpacking by myself for a while.”

“Thank you.” Jim grinned, kissing Gary again, “I swear, it’s just a few personnel files I need to check over and then I’ll be all yours.”

 

~***~

 

For the first time in months, Jim awoke to the sound of his alarm clock. That was going to take some getting used to – being able to lie in most mornings had been one of the very few benefits to working a ground assignment. The clock read 0600 ship time, and alpha shift didn’t start for another three hours so Jim turned off the alarm and snuggled back into the blankets, figuring he should be able to get another half-hour’s sleep at the very least. However, one factor he had forgotten to consider was that the alarm had also woken Gary, who grumbled something incoherent before trying (and mostly failing) to shove Jim out of the bed rather than let him continue sleeping.

“Hey!”

Head still buried in his pillow, Gary mumbled, “Big day. Lots of work. You shoul’ get started.”

“Well then why are you still half asleep, huh?”

“ ‘cause ‘m not captain.”

“Okay, I get it. I’ll see you later, yeah?” Jim pressed a quick kiss to the top of Gary’s head before going to get ready.

He had expected the cafeteria to be pretty much completely empty when he got down there, considering how early it still was once he had left his quarters. What he _should_ have been expecting, he realised on entering the room, was for his hyper-efficient first officer to be sitting there already, absentmindedly eating his breakfast with one hand and focusing entirely on the PADD he had in the other hand.

After going to grab some breakfast from the replicator, Jim sat in the seat opposite Spock’s, putting his tray down slightly more forcefully than normal when his presence went unacknowledged. But still, nothing.

“Good morning, Spock.” He said pointedly, and the Vulcan finally looked up, raising an eyebrow as he did so.

“Captain,” Spock replied, before turning back to his work.

Sighing, Jim took out his own PADD and got to work.

The two men ate and did their work in silence, and when they were done they walked to the bridge together in silence and took their respective stations. In silence.

Looking around, it occurred to Jim that this was probably the emptiest he had ever seen the bridge, as every time he’d been on it there had been either been at least a few crew members working at their stations, or engineers doing repair work. It was almost unsettling, not to have the bustling work atmosphere.

Over the next half-hour or so, the rest of the bridge crew started trickling in, and Jim felt some of the tension in his shoulders leave as the noise of quiet chatter and workstations began to fill the room. He shot Gary a quick grin when he walked out of the turbolift with Bones, but otherwise said nothing to him and left him to take his seat. Bones, only on the bridge because he needed to be briefed for the first assignment, stood in his usual spot beside Jim’s chair, and the two quietly discussed business for a few minutes.

When it looked like everyone had arrived, Jim cleared his throat and waited as the hubbub quickly died down. “Welcome, everybody, to the start of our five-year mission.” He paused, looking around at everyone. “The admiralty seems to be under the impression that we need to be broken in, so our first few assignments will be fairly basic. Routine checks, diplomatic meetings. That sort of thing.

“First planet we’ll be visiting is M-113, for routine medical check-ups of the two people living there: Professor Crater and his wife Nancy. Dr McCoy and I will be beaming down to the surface along with a member of security. The whole mission shouldn’t take more than an hour.” When nobody turned back to their stations, he hastily added “That’s it.” to finish.

“Sulu, take us out.”

When Jim felt the Enterprise’s engines kick in he leaned back in his chair and opened up his PADD. Officially, the mission had only started ten minutes before, and yet already he was completely swamped with paperwork.

He hadn’t been working for long, however, when he heard footsteps coming up to his chair. “Yes, Mr Spock?” he asked, looking up from the PADD.

“Captain, it is unnecessary for you to beam down for the mission. Doctor McCoy is more than capable of performing such a simple task alone.”

Jim grinned. “Why, Spock, are you gonna miss me?” he teased, but at the sight of Spock’s shoulders tensing up, he laughed it off, and added “I’m _joking_ Spock.”

He turned back to his work, but after a few seconds had passed and Spock was still standing there he said “But I am going on that mission.”

Spock gave a barely noticeable sigh of irritation and walked away.

>>From: Lieutenant Mitchell

     To: Captain Kirk

     Subject: What did you do to Spock? Looks like someone shoved a stick up his ass.

>>From: Captain Kirk

     To: Lieutenant Mitchell

     Subject: Shouldn’t you be working, Lieutenant?

>> You can talk, besides, how am I meant to work when my commanding officers are about to murder each other? I’m not exactly gonna miss that.

>>You’re not funny.

>>Aw come on, you know you love me really.

>> WORK.

 

~***~

 

Jim strode down the corridor heading to the transporter room, with Bones and their security, Darnell, walking a pace behind him. As cool as he felt walking ahead of the two like this, it made Jim feel as though he were being left out of a conversation, despite both Bones and Darnell being dead silent behind him. Nonetheless, he spun around and started walking backwards, keeping the same pace as he had when going the right way around.

Almost immediately Bones told Jim “You’ll break your back if you walk like that,” accompanying it with an eye roll.

“So Bones,” Jim started, choosing to ignore that comment. “Do you think the professor’s wife is Nancy? As in _Nancy_ Nancy?”

“Your explanation skills never cease to amaze me.” McCoy commented, but didn’t go on to answer Jim’s question.

Jim also said nothing, but raised his eyebrow and stared at him.

“God, who do you think you are, Spock?” he grumbled, but this time he did continue. “How the hell would I know if it was the same Nancy, it’s a pretty common name,”

He was interrupted by a splutter from Jim, “Yeah, about 300 years ago.”

“Anyways, I haven’t even talked to her since we broke up 10 years ago, she could be _dead_ for all I know.”

“Have a bit of faith, Bones.” Jim turned around before McCoy could reply, and walked through the doors into the transporter room.

The planet that they beamed down to was deserted, the landscape completely bare, save a few ruins and a building off in the distance, presumably the home of the professor and his wife. In fact, the entire area looked like a large desert, and Jim was reminded of another desert-like planet, of scorching heat and sand, and he felt a lump form in his throat.

As they approached the building, Jim spotted some sort of plant growing near a rock and gestured towards it. “Want to pick some flowers, Doctor? It’s the polite thing to do, I think, when visiting someone you have history with.”

“Is that how you get girls to like you, by bribing them?”

Jim shrugged. “Is there any other way?”

Bones rolled his eyes and continued into the building, Jim and Darnell following behind him. The room the entrance led in to was large, with stone walls and floors. It looked more like the sort of place you would expect to see tourists and historians traipsing through than somewhere to call a home.

At the sound of footsteps, he turned to introduce himself to the person coming from the corridor to his right – a woman in her eighties, maybe seventies if he was being generous. So. Definitely not Bones’ Nancy. But Bones… he had a weird look on his face. His eyes were widened in excitement, and he had the biggest smile on his face that Jim had ever seen. Well, big compared to his usual glare, at least.

“Leonard,” Nancy said, smiling right back at him. “What has it been, ten years? Come here and let me look at you.”

Bones took a step forward and, when Nancy took his face in her hands, Jim could’ve sworn he saw a blush creep across his cheeks. Crazy, how this woman had turned the man to jelly within two minutes of being around them.

Crewman Darnell was also looking at Nancy strangely, although he snapped back to attention when he realised Jim had noticed.

“Problem, crewman?” He challenged, because sure, this woman was old but the man had no right to be judging a superior officer.

“No, no no no.” Darnell replied, still looking at Nancy. “It’s just – I know it’s impossible, but she looks exactly like this woman I met on Rigley’s pleasure planet this one time…”

Faced with the thought that perhaps every member of his team save for himself was going crazy, Jim snapped perhaps a little too harshly. “Get out, Darnell.” When the young man did nothing except look confused and slightly terrified, Jim added “go. We need somebody to man the door.”

The sound of Darnell leaving made Bones and Nancy draw their attention away from one another, and Nancy’s looked at the entrance in thought for a moment.

“I think I’ll just go fetch my husband, if that’s alright. I shouldn’t be gone for more than a couple of minutes,” Nancy said, before hastily walking out.

When they were alone in the room, Bones turned to Jim, that ridiculous grin still plastered on his face. “I can’t believe it’s really her! And did you _see_ her?”

“Oh, yes, I saw her.” Jim said, trying not to say too much in case he ruined this rare good mood of Bones’.

“She hasn’t aged at all since we broke up, if I didn’t know better I would say she was still twenty-five! There’s not a grey hair on her head!”

This was, to Jim, a step too far in this crazy fantasy. “She’s got _some_ grey, Bones,” he said softly, still trying not to be too harsh. “She’s… good-looking, I’ll give you that. But hardly twenty-five.”

“But she looks _exactly_ – “ Bones stopped himself. “I suppose it could just be nostalgia. Romance vision, or something. You’re right, she couldn’t be…” He trailed off, looking out in the direction Nancy had walked off in.

 

~***~

 

He’d never seen a picture of the man, but still professor Crater looked almost exactly how Jim had expected him to. Not that he’d had a specific mental image of him, but when he walked into the room there was absolutely no surprise, just an easy recognition. Although that may have been due to the fact that he was, quite literally, the only man on the planet.

Rather than introduce himself, the first thing that Crater said was “Whilst your sense of duty is overwhelming, I suggest you go back to your little ship and tell Starfleet to leave Nancy and I alone. I guarantee that we’re both doing perfectly fine. All we need is salt tablets for the heat.”

Bones, who had up to that point remained in a good mood, suddenly snapped back to ‘grumpy doctor mode’. “I’m pleased to hear you’re doing well, and all, but it’s my job to make sure of that.”

Crater, like Bones, was becoming more and more hostile. “Forgive me if I don’t want to be prodded and poked with your _arcane_ machinery,” he said, sweeping his hands in the air.

“What you _want_ is irrelevant, dammit. I –“

Jim cut him off before things got any more heated. “What Doctor McCoy is trying to say,” he started, shooting a glare at Bones, “is that Starfleet regulations say you have to have a full medical check-up once a year or you won’t be allowed to continue your research on this planet.”

Professor Crater, however, didn’t seem to be listening to a word Jim said. He was looking at Bones with a curious expression, all his previous hostility gone. “Did I hear the Captain call you Doctor McCoy?”

“You did.” Bones had obviously not had the same sudden change of heart.

“Good, good,” the Professor muttered, “it’s good she’s seen an old friend.”

Before they could say any more, the conversation was interrupted by a blood-curdling scream from somewhere outside. Since Darnell was trained not to scream in stressful or scary situations, that meant it could only be coming from Nancy.

All three men ran outside, following the sound from Nancy’s screaming to find her. She was backed up against a large rock, her hand covering her mouth in horror as she looked on at the sight in front of her. Darnell was lying there, half on the ground and half across another rock. He wasn’t moving at all, and a quick scan on Bones’ tricorder confirmed that he had died.

Bones squatted down to examine the body closer, running a finger over the strange mottling on the skin. He stopped for a moment, before pulling a small leaf out of the mouth.

It was becoming apparent that Crater had an incredibly short temper, because he suddenly burst out in anger again. “What the hell kind of starship sends out a security officer who doesn’t even have enough sense in his brain not to eat an untested plant?!”

Jim, trying his best to keep his composure, replied “I don’t _know_ , Professor. He was a perfectly competent officer.”

“Bullshit.”

Ignoring him, Jim got out his communicator and hailed the Enterprise.

“Kirk to Enterprise, two to beam up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it! I'll try update again before the end of the week, but things are a bit crazy at the moment because I just started at university this weekend.
> 
> As always, _please_ leave a comment to let me know what you thought, or message me on my [tumblr](http://superangsty.tumblr.com)


	3. The Man Trap (part 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 of 2. Based on the TOS episode 'the man trap'

“How’s it going, Mr Spock?”

Spock turned to look at Uhura, who had left her station and was standing by him, one arm resting on the back of his chair. “We are in orbit around M-113, as we have been for the past hour. All ship functions are running without problem.” He paused for a moment, looking down at his PADD. “Your last subspace log contained an error in the frequency column.”

“Spock, I swear if I hear you say the word ‘frequency’ to me one more time I might scream.”

“Since it is illogical for a communications officer to resent the word ‘frequency’, I have no answer.”

Uhura threw her hands in the air, huffing in frustration as she did so. “Is it so impossible for you to have a normal human conversation?!”

The rest of the bridge crew, Spock noticed, had slowed down considerably in their work. He saw Chekov and Sulu exchange a glance, of some sort. Ah. So they were listening.

“Yes, as I am not – “

 “That’s not my point, and you know it.” Uhura leaned closer to him and spoke under her breath. “We were together for _two years,_ Spock. And I thought that meant we were friends, but ever since we got the five-year mission you’ve barely said a word to me about anything unrelated to work.”

“I…” For once, Spock had no idea what to say. He had, until then, assumed that he and Uhura _were_ still friends, as that is the agreement they had made when terminating their romantic relationship. But since then he hadn’t been sure what to say or do with her, concerned that he might overstep the bounds of this friendship.

Having only paused for a moment, he snapped back to attention and said “return to your station, lieutenant. We can discuss any non-work issues over dinner tonight. Understood?”

“Perfectly, commander,” Uhura replied with a grin, heading back to her station.

Spock was unable to get back to the work he had been doing, however, because almost as soon as Uhura had left his side a comm from the transporter bay came through.

“The landing party has returned, Commander Spock. One dead.”

Time seemed to slow down, for a moment. It felt as though Spock could hear nothing, and the thumping of his heart in his side seemed all consuming. All he could think was Kirk. Kirk smiling and teasing and fighting and dying and dying and - 

A hand gripping his shoulder brought him back to focus, and he looked up at Uhura just as she was saying “oh my God…”

“Explain.”

She looked at him critically. “You can’t honestly tell me you feel nothing, Spock. What if it were the Captain?”

Out of the corner of his eye, Spock saw lieutenant Mitchell pale. Keeping his voice calm, and raising it just enough that Mitchell would hear, he answered “if it were the Captain, we would have been notified by now.” He opened the comm link. “Spock to medbay, I will be with you in three minutes.”

He stood up and stepped away from the captain’s chair. “Sulu, you have the conn.”

 

~***~

 

Spock stood by the body in the medbay, taking in every detail. The unfamiliar mottling covering the man’s entire face and neck, the small piece of plant matter still in his mouth. Doctor McCoy was walking up and down the bed, scanning the body with his tricorder over and over again, the look on his face showing an emotion that Spock couldn’t quite place. Anger? Perhaps. But it was just as likely to be confusion, as far as Spock knew.

After a few minutes of this, McCoy slammed the tricorder shut with a huff of frustration. “Eating that plant didn’t kill him.”

Curious, Spock leaned in to get a closer look at the plant, then checking it against databases on his PADD. “I believe this species is similar to Earth’s nightshade. It has potential for harm, but the doctor is right, it cannot be what killed him. The symptoms are wrong.”

McCoy looked at Spock and, to his surprise, nodded in agreement. “Right. I know alkaloid poisoning when I see it, and this? Not it.”

Kirk crossed his arms, then uncrossed them, then crossed them again. “Then what the hell killed him?”

“As far as I can tell, he should just get up and walk away,” replied McCoy, making a sweeping gesture. “I’ve tried every test I can think of, and they all say there’s nothing wrong with him.”

“I’ve lost a man, Bones!” Kirk shouted, “I want to know what’s killed him, and the best you can give me is ‘nothing’?!”

Apparently for McCoy this was the final straw, as, with a calm rage, he instructed “get out.”

Kirk glared at McCoy for a few long moments, before turning around and storming out of the medbay, saying “Spock, we’re done here.”

 

~***~

 

An hour doing nothing followed on the bridge. Jim had made an order to continue orbiting around the planet, feeling unable to leave until he was certain of what had killed Darnell. Spock seemed to be getting more and more agitated by the minute, insisting that it was vital they continued on their way to rendezvous with a nearby ship, to deliver the cargo they had requested.

The ‘cargo’ was some spices from Earth. Jim doubted it was urgent.

Just when the boredom was starting to get to him, his communicator sounded.

“McCoy to bridge.”

In an instant, Jim answered sharply. “Kirk here, what is it?”

“I’ve tried every test and scan in the book, Jim.  And I think I found something.” He paused. “There’s no sodium chloride in his body at all.”

Jim leaned forward, despite the fact that the action did absolutely nothing of use. “You mean to say that all the salt is just… gone?”

“…Yes.”

“The skin mottling,” Jim started, but was answered by Bones before he could finish the sentence.

“Another error on my part, I’m afraid.”

“Ah, I’m not counting. I think I owe you an apology.”

“There’ll be time for that later, kid.” Jim swore he could hear some of the tension leave Bones’ voice. “But look, what was one thing that both Crater and Nancy went out of their way to ask for?”

“Salt,” Jim said, understanding dawning on him. He stood up. “Spock, we’re going to need a landing party, can you get us some security?”

 

~***~

 

As soon as the team arrived planetside, Crater strolled out to greet them, tutting and shaking his head as he did so. “Does the federation flagship have nothing better to do than ask little old me some questions?”

“We do, Professor. Believe me, we do.” Jim glanced behind Crater, looking to see if Nancy was following him outside. “And where would your wife be?”

“You can’t just beam down here and – and interrogate us! We have rights, you know.”

Jim looked at the security team, nodding his head slightly to indicate that they should go look for Nancy. They easily got the message, and headed off to start their search. He then turned back to professor Crater, fighting the urge to shake some sense into the man.

“I understand your objections, Mr Crater, but what _you_ have to understand is that something on this planet killed one of my crew. For all we know it could be a danger to you and Nancy as well, so we have to identify the threat. We’re going to need you two to come aboard the Enterprise with us until we’re sure it’s safe down here”

Crater’s short temper had clearly not improved since earlier that day, because he snapped out “Not happening. And my wife and I have been here for five years, we’d know of any ‘threat’ by now!”

Tired of making pointless arguments, Jim sighed. “Bones?”

Bones stepped forwards. "Our crewmember died of salt depletion. Sudden total loss of it. Medically impossible.” He paused, checking for a reaction. “And it just so happens that you and Na – and Mrs Crater were both insisting I give you salt tablets."

“And can that _brilliant_ brain of yours not come up with an explanation as to why we, residents on as hot a planet as this one, may need extra salt, _Doctor_?”

After turning and shooting an ‘I’m so done with this’ look at Jim, Bones started saying “yes, but –“

He stopped short when he realised that Crater was no longer there.

As if that wasn’t enough, Jim and Bones had barely started their search for Crater when they heard crewman Green yelling for backup.

The ran to the source of the shouting, to find Green standing over a body. Out of the corner of his eye, Jim saw Bones’ shoulders tense. Moving closer revealed that the body was Crewman Sturgeon, skin once again covered in the strange mottling that they’d found on Darnell.

“I couldn’t – I got here too late,” Green said, shuddering. “She was dead when I found her.”

Jim was lost in thought, barely registering when Bones stepped in to respond. “Did you find Mrs Crater?”

Green shook his head.

Bones turned back to Jim, placing a hand on his elbow quickly. “They could be anywhere by now, and there’s no way in hell we can search this whole planet on foot. We should beam back up before anybody else gets hurt.

 

~***~

 

As soon as Bones got back to the ship he headed for his quarters, figuring that since he’d had to work a massive amount of overtime that day that he deserved some rest before the next big disaster happened. The rest of the medical team would be able to sort out the new body, since there was nothing different about this death compared to the last.

For the next hour or so he tossed and turned in bed, trying to get comfortable, trying to clear his mind. But still, sleep evaded him. He knew that if it were another crewmember struggling to sleep, he wouldn’t hesitate to suggest they have a sleeping pill, but for all he supported medication, Bones hated having to take any.

His door sounded and he instantly sprung up, walking over there before saying “enter.”

And in walked Nancy, looking even more beautiful than she had the last time he’d seen her, if that was possible.

“…Nancy? I thought you were on the planet?”

She chuckled softly and said “I guess you thought wrong.” She took a step closer to Bones, until there was almost no space between them.

Bones took a sharp breath. “Nancy… your husband…”

“He doesn’t _care_ about me, not as much as you do. I can feel it.” She looked up at him inching her face closer to his, but she pulled away at the last second. “But you’re tired. You should rest.”

“I wish I could.  I’d even consider taking a sleeping pill at this point.”

“Well maybe you should.” In a flash, Nancy went to his cabinet and reappeared with a pill in her hand, and handed it to him. “Take it. It’ll help.”

Already feeling drowsy, Bones nodded and went back to lie on his bed. As if from a great distance, or like it was underwater, he heard his communicator chirp.

“Medbay to McCoy, you’re needed down here. We’ve found another body.”

He tried to sit up, but a combination of the fast acting sleeping pills and the hand pressing down on his chest, he was barely able to move.

“Shh, Nancy will handle it.”

That was the last thing he heard before falling unconscious.

Nancy shifted into McCoy and headed out to the medbay.

 

~***~

 

“Mr Spock, has the scan of the planet come up with anything yet?”

“Yes, Captain. I believe I have located the Professor.” Spock leaned further other his chair, peering at the screen.  “And another dead body, it would seem.”

God damn.

“Send the body to medbay and beam Crater up. I think it’s time he answered a few questions.”

Spock relayed the orders to the transporter bay, and a few minutes later the communicator on his chair sounded.

“Medbay here. We’ve received crewman Green’s body.”

It felt as though Jim’s heart had dropped to his stomach in panic. “You mean Nancy Crater? Green beamed back with us.”

“Uh…” There was a pause, presumably them checking the records. “Nope. Definitely Green.”

He turned off the comm looked at Spock. “Green beamed back up with us.”

“So we thought. But it could just as well have been something in Green’s image.”

“And if Crater and the body were the only lifeforms on the planet, then…”

“Nancy.”

“Which means that whatever creature this is, it’s on this ship with us.”

Jim pressed the comm link on his chair, starting a shipwide announcement. “Yellow alert, there is an intruder on board. Everyone not on duty back in your quarters.”

He then flipped open his communicator and hailed Bones. “McCoy, meet me and Spock down in the brig. We need some answers from Crater.”

He gestured for Spock to follow him to the turbolift and together they went down to the brig, meeting Bones as they got off the lift and then the three of them walked to the holding cell.

Crater was leaned against the wall, clearly bored out of his mind and angrier than Jim had ever seen him. He decided to just cut to the chase.

“Were you aware that we had an intruder on board?” he asked.

“…”, said Crater.

“Where’s the real Nancy?”

The professor huffed out a bitter laugh. “Dead.  Creature killed her about a year ago.”

“Could you recognise this… ‘creature’, in whatever form it’s taken.”

There was a pause and Crater looked intently at each of the three men, eyes staying the longest on Bones. “…Maybe.”

He continued, “you have to understand, she’s the last of her kind. Used to be millions of them, they covered the entire planet. And now it’s just her. To kill her would be to send an entire species to extinction.”

“Were you merely preserving the species, Professor?” Spock asked, “Or creating a private heaven. You have everyone in the universe at your beck and call.”

Before Crater could come up with an answer, Jim cut in. “You will help us find it.”

Crater shook his head. “I can’t.” There was almost a trace of sadness in his eyes. Almost.

“Well then you’re posing a danger to my ship. You’ll have to be put under the influence of truth serum.” He looked at Bones. “Can you arrange that, Doctor?”

Adamantly, Bones replied “You _know_ how against I am using that.” He fidgeted, before muttering, “but I suppose in this case I have no choice. I’ll administer it in the medbay.”

Jim nodded, adding “Spock, you go up there with them.”

“Yes, Captain.”

 

~***~

 

A short while after Spock, Bones, and Crater had gone down to the medbay, Jim decided to follow them, since there was no way he’d be able to get any paperwork done when all he could think about was the fact that there was an intruder on the loose.

However, when he got down there, the medbay was empty. It was dark, and completely silent.

No, not _completely_ silent. He swore he could hear some ragged breathing coming from behind one of the beds. Ordering the lights on, he rushed over there, crouching down next to the person.

The lights turned on, and once his eyes re-adjusted Jim realised that it was Spock lying there, a smudge of green blood at his temple and one hand clutching his side. Shit.

Spock propped himself up on one elbow, and said “…wasn’t McCoy… tried to kill me but…”

“Your blood is copper based, I know.” Spock seemed to be getting his breath back. “Crater?”

“Dead. We have to… McCoy doesn’t know…”

 

~***~

The sound of his doors swishing open woke Bones from his sleep. Through his bleary eyes, he could have sworn he saw himself rushing into the room, but then he blinked, and it was Nancy.

She had tears streaming down her face, and when she spoke her voice was high pitched in hysteria. “Leonard, Leonard please you’ve got to help me.” She took a shaky breath. “They’re going to kill me, Leonard please – “

“Step aside,” came a voice from the doorway.

Bones looked confusedly at Jim. He wasn’t sure whether he should be more bewildered by the scene unfolding before him or by the fact that people kept entering his room as they pleased, despite him being pretty sure he had locked the door.

“Jim? What’s going on?” He asked, taking a step in front of Nancy when he realised there was a phaser being pointed at her.

Jim’s voice was almost eerily calm when he replied. “That’s not Nancy, Bones.”

He stared at Jim, waiting for him to crack a smile, to say that this was all some messed-up joke. When that never came, he asked “are you _insane?_ ”

“It killed four crew members, and now Crater, too.”

“It?!” Bones was starting to feel as though everybody was getting crazier and crazier by the minute.

With his free hand, Jim gestured towards Nancy. “The creature. It needs salt to live. Please, Bones. Move aside.”

Nancy’s hand started tapping away at his arm, and she muttered “please, Len, if you love me you’ll make him go away.”

Bones thought. Other than the fact that Jim was, well, _Jim_ , and the captain on the Enterprise, he had no reason to believe a thing he was saying. But Nancy… Nancy couldn’t possibly be an imposter, she was real. She had to be. Because she was exactly as Bones remembered, and she still loved him. If he saved her, he would get another chance.

He leapt forwards and wrestled the phaser off Jim.

In the split second that this happened, Nancy also pounced towards Jim, and after the moment it took Bones to recover from grabbing the phaser he looked up to see her restraining Jim by his arms.

Jim shoot him a look as if to say ‘see what I mean?’, but still nothing was making any sense.

A few moments later Spock burst in, panting and with blood on his face. Seriously, Bones really needed to get that door checked out.

“Doctor McCoy, it’s killing the Captain. You must shoot it.”

This was one thing that Bones did know the answer to. “II won’t kill Nancy.”

Nancy leant in to Jim, almost burying her face in his neck, and then before his eyes Bones saw her shift into something – into something hideous.

Spock gestured towards it, asking quietly, “is this your Nancy, Doctor?”

The creature’s mouth was almost touching Jim, and then Jim was screaming, and after that Bones wasn’t entirely aware of his surroundings as he shouted out “NO!” and, his entire body shaking, pulled the trigger on the phaser.

The creature cried out in pain and dropped to the ground.

 

~***~

 

That evening, Bones was sat in his office, unable to bring himself to go back to his room, when Jim walked in.

“I thought I might find you in here. Pretty tough day, huh?” He said quietly.

Bones turned and opened up his small liquor cabinet, pulling out a bottle of Romulan ale whilst grumbling “Tell me about it.” He poured a glass for each of them.

Jim raised an eyebrow. “Romulan ale, Doctor? Don’t you know that’s illegal?” He teased.

“Sure, just don’t tell the captain I have it.”

“Your secret’s safe with me. Now are you gonna tell me what’s up or are you just going to stay here and mope like an idiot?”

Bones sighed and put his head in his hands. “You have no idea,” he started, “, you have no idea how it feels to watch somebody that you loved die like that and not being able to help them.”

Jim put a hand on his shoulder “Bones, that wasn’t Nancy, you know that.”

“But it might as well have been!” Bones shouted, feeling himself finally snap. “It might as well have been, and I had to kill her. How could you ever possibly know how that feels?”

“You’re right, I don’t. Come on, let’s get some more alcohol in you.”

Bones gave a watery smile. “Dammit man, you’re going to turn me into an alcoholic.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it! Sorry this update was a little later than I said it would be. After I post the next chapter, I'll be combining parts one and two to make one long chapter, just so that the overall formatting of the fic is better!
> 
> As always, please leave a comment or go message me on my [tumblr!](http://superangsty.tumblr.com)

**Author's Note:**

> At the moment, I should theoretically have an update about once a week, although I've not got a specific day for this. Thanks for reading!


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